Tinknbubb

This is a rather different post to what I normally write but I feel like I have to.  Looking back on my pregnancy and the first few months of having Lilly I was so naive. I really didn't know what I was doing and what I had to come. I was very lucky with my pregnancy on how it went. I never thought about how much my body would change or anything, I never brought a maternity item or any special creams for stretch marks so I ended up living in jogging bottoms or jeans held together with a hairtie.  The one thing that I did use was pretty natal vitamins from the very start.  Going into the final few week I packed my hospital bag which was almost OK as had watched a few YouTube video. I made sure that I had plenty of bits for Lilly and even took some milk cartons in to. I went into labor just as I wanted to, with my waters breaking and got very excited but ended up being sick for about an hour after they broke, I then went into panic mode which in ...

I have lit a candle tonight for all the little ones that have been taken to early from our lives. This is my memory of our very little one who never made possible the first trimester. At the age of 19, me and my other half decided that we should have a family together, we had our own flat, I had a good job, we were settled and ready. I fell very easily, within 1 month actually and we were so happy and couldn't believe it had happened so quickly. Every seemed to be fine and went to my doctor to tell him, we then got referred to a midwife and met her. It felt amazing!  A few days later while at home, I noticed some spotting, only a little but it got my heart racing. But tried to relax. It started to worsen so I phoned Liam who was concerned. The next morning we phoned the hospital and they told us to come in for a check, we went straight in for a scan and had bloods taken. The good news was, was that we were pregnant, the bad news was, was that our baby was...

I cannot believe that my little girl is going to be three years old. I see her grow and change every day but can't believe that three years have passed since I gave birth to her. Three years today was the most surreal day of my life, starting a new chapter, not only for me and but for me and Liam as a couple.  She is the best thing that happened to us and I am so thankful that we have a beautiful, clever little girl who knows how to make us smile and feel better with her quirky personality. I have watched her grow into this little girl who wants to explore and learn in any way she can, she knows how to push our limits and winds us up like no tomorrow but I wouldn't change her for the world. To Our Lilly, We wish you a very happy birthday,  You have made our life so fun and unpredictable, you have an amazing personality and you make me laugh and and smile so much every day, You have so many amazing adventures coming along and I know that you a...

I have been thinking about this a lot lately, and wanted to write it down before my memory forgets bits and I thought that it would be cool to share with you. So on the 12th of September 2012, I had a sweep performed and was told to get rest, have a bath and that sort of thing, I had also been booked in to be induced on the 15th if sweep didn't work. I remember her telling me that it may be uncomfortable, and I said back I have to give birth in the next week and she laughed. So that day I went home and relaxed, nothing happened. On the Thursday I woke up late, had a bath and loads of food...nom lol. Then at about 8:30pm I had rather a major bleed, so went to hospital to be monitored for an hour, was sent home about about 10pm. This turned out to be my plug. I tried to go straight to sleep but was getting little twinges. Managed to kind of drop off at about 11pm and then my waters decided to break. I sat up and went to my other half 'I think my waters have...

So two years ago today was the first time i saw out little girl :) a small little baby on the screen. I remember sitting in the waiting room thinking all these what ifs?  what if there's nothing there? what if it was like before? what if the hearts not beating? the scariest part of my whole pregnancy I think.  But to our amazement and joy a little baby popped up on the screen in front of us. He kept moving the wand over my belly, it was surreal that the baby on the screen was in my belly.  I know the pain of bad news, being told sorry it not going to survive, but the second time was our turn and our little girls turn to be a part of this world.  I believe that I was more grateful for her but more worried through the whole time being pregnant because of my past. For those who have loved and lost, spare a thought. For no matter how long you are pregnant they are still a part of you.  Viki xx...